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Welcome to the Mystery School
Two paths diverged in a wood…
I took the one less traveled and that has made all the difference.
Robert Frost
You are about to embark on a journey of self discovery. This is not an easy path, nor is it a well-traveled one. It is, however, a worthwhile journey to make. Going within, finding out who you are and what you want, discovering what makes you tick (and giggle and sigh and laugh and cry and scream), is what allows you to live your life fully.
Did you ever think that you were missing something? Do you ever find yourself thinking “There must be more to life than this”? There is you know. There is so much more. So much that we are not aware of until we come to grips with who we are first. That is the starting point to revealing all of the wonders of the universe. Because the universe is just a reflection of ourselves. When we can see ourselves clearly, then the universe is reflected in all of our splendor.
What you are about to experience is the compilation of lessons that I and others have learned, and that we continue to learn in our lives. It is a short-cut through the thicket of confusion that comes with any process of self-exploration. Keep in mind as you read, however, that a shortcut through the woods will get you where you’re going faster than planned – sometimes faster than you’re ready for – if you’re not careful. Take it slowly. Let it sink in. Practice as you go. Or, as my former boyfriend, Daniel, said after editing a book I wrote over a weekend – “Warning – learning this stuff too quickly could cause your head to explode.” Bright blessings, my friends, and happy exploring.
Why Seek Enlightenment?
Definition of Insanity:
Doing the same thing and expecting different results.
Alcoholics Anonymous
I have sat with the question of why one seeks enlightenment for a while now. I am not sure how to answer the question for everyone and so I merely offer you my reasoning for why I have sought it. You may come to the table for a totally different reason than I did, and if so, I encourage you to write to me to tell me why you seek to be enlightened.
I began this part of my life when I got divorced. At that time, I set out to discover who I was, and what I wanted from my life. I realized that I had been living my life according to the expectations of those around me and of society in general. I realized that I had been unconsciously doing “the checklist” of what I thought you were supposed to do in order to be happy. I graduated high school and went on to college. I got married. If my husband had wanted children, I would have had them too. I got the big house, the two cars and the dog. I had it all. But I never thought about whether or not I wanted it. It never occurred to me that I would want anything other than what we term, “The American Dream”. It turns out that I didn’t want it after all. That was easy enough to determine once I had arrived and found myself dissatisfied.
Deciding what I did want was trickier. The processes I’ve outlined for you in this book are what allowed me to find those answers for myself. They also helped me to understand why the world worked the way it did and how I could take care of my wants and needs within that context. Through this inner work, I gained a sense of balance, strength, and peace. I found that when I was actively engaging this process, I was happier, more at ease with myself, and more emotionally available to others. In short, I did it, and I still do it, because it makes me happy.
What is your reason for being here? Is it a strong enough motivation to fuel you through this journey? If not, why not? How can you make your resolve stronger? Really take a look at why you’ve come to this work.
Change can be a scary thing. It helps if we keep our reasons for making that change at the forefront of our consciousness to remind us why it is important to continue. Fear can often cause us to backslide into old behavior patterns – back into our comfort zone – leaving us stuck and frustrated. But if we are brave, and our desire for something better is greater than our fear of the unknown, then we can make it through. If your reasons for engaging this process are compelling, then read on.
Caution: Slippery Slope
Raise your sail one foot and you get ten feet of wind.
Chinese Proverb
Welcome to the Mystery School. The concept of a Mystery School has a history dating back to ancient times. In these schools, people would learn the secrets of the universe, science, magic, and any number of other topics. Before they would be accepted into these schools, students were put through trials to test their resolve and desire. The trial could be as simple as requiring that (without being told that this was the requirement), the student ask to join three times. Or it could be as complex as undertaking a quest of some sort. The theory being that the students had to be fully prepared to commit to the process before the school would undertake teaching them. Given that some of the information was life-altering, it was for the student’s safety as well as for the school’s benefit that these trials were conducted.
Thankfully, today we don’t have to go through the same challenges to get access to this type of information. Nonetheless, the risks remain the same. Once we learn how to read, we can never be illiterate again. No matter how much we wish we didn’t know what the words say, we will know, even if we refuse to read them. Much like learning to read, once you embark on this path you will never be illiterate again as to the workings of the universe. Since there is no challenge for you to pass prior to getting into this school, here is your warning:
Listening to these recordings will remove from you the ability to be unconscious about your life. There can be no turning back on this path once you embark upon it. It is a one-way street. This is not to say that you can’t turn a blind eye. I’ve seen that done on more than one occasion. But refusing to acknowledge what you have read and not knowing how to read are two completely different things. Even if you choose to walk away from this path, from here on out, you will always recognize its signs. And the one thing I have learned over the years is that the universe is far less patient with those of us who know how to read than it is with those who don’t. So if you’re not sure you want to learn this stuff, or if you’re not ready to make changes in your life, perhaps this is not the site for you. But, if you are ready for this work, then it will be some of the hardest, and most rewarding that you have ever done. With that said, please remember as you walk this path that you are only human. There is a learning curve that goes with this material. Some of it you will get right away. Some of it will sit and fester in your brain until it finally integrates in a bang one day. You will believe that you understand some of this information when you hear it, only to find out a few months or years down the road, that your understanding was incomplete or flawed because you only saw it on one level. There is no right or wrong to this process. Be kind with yourself and know that you are exactly where you are meant to be at any given point in time. Enjoy the journey, for that is all there is.
The Rollercoaster of Enlightenment (Recorded Message)
Speaking in Metaphors
We are four dimensional beings
in three dimensional bodies,
looking out two-dimensional windshields.
Cowboy Neal at the Wheel
I have chosen to use “the universe” as my catch-all phrase meaning “that which is larger than ourselves”. It was as neutral of a phrase as I could get so as to make the reading accessible to everyone. If you are more comfortable thinking of this as God, spirit, Allah, Jehovah, the angels, our higher selves, etc., then I encourage you to substitute those words in place of mine. It is not the words we use, but the meaning behind them which is important.
The Never-Ending Spiral
If you want to know if your purpose has been fulfilled take this one test.
If you’re still here – you’re not done.
Richard Bach – Illusions
One of the most frustrating parts of spiritual growth is the never-ending spiral. This is the process through which you engage the same issues over and over again. Just when you think you have finally addressed a particular issue and gotten completely through it, it comes up again in a new way and from a new perspective. I call this the never-ending spiral because it is as though you are going deeper and deeper into the issue. One more turn deeper, down into the never-ending spiral. It could also easily be called the onion principle, but that would imply an end to the process when you get to the middle. Thus far in my studies, I have not found an end to the process. Just like Richard Bach says in the quote above: if you’re still here – you’re not done.
My point in telling you about the spiral, is to reassure you that returning to your issues again and again is a natural part of the process. Don’t make the mistake of thinking you’re ever done with a particular issue. You’ll come back to most of them over and over again; but this time it will be on another level, in a different form, and from a differing viewpoint. You need to look at your issues from all angles. Don’t get frustrated that you’re back looking at the same old thing again. That is exactly where you are supposed to be.
This was one of the hardest concepts for me to accept. I wanted to be done! I worked so hard! I really got my teeth into it! I didn’t run away from the issue. I faced it head on and met the challenge. I should be rewarded by never having to deal with it again – right? Wrong. It just doesn’t work that way. To be honest, I still fight this frustration from time to time. What I have managed to learn though, is that if I don’t fight it, I can get through the turns faster and with less anguish. This is because I’m not spending nearly so much time whining (I admit, I can be a whiner at times). Instead, I spend my energy working on the issue. I’ve also found, to my great astonishment, that after dealing with the first few levels on a subject, I’m really beginning to enjoy the process of going deeper on it. I no longer see it as threatening, irritating, or frustrating because I no longer see it as a sign of a failure on my part. Instead I approach each go around as an opportunity. Why the change? Perhaps I’ve gotten older and gained a little more patience with myself and the universe. Perhaps it’s just that I have experience with the issues and don’t find them so intimidating anymore. Or perhaps it is simply a matter of getting so familiar with my issues that they are like old friends come around for a long philosophical discussion to take me to that next level. Whatever it is, it is a recurring theme in my process of unfolding, as it will likely be in yours too. The less you fight it, that easier it will become.
One Final Thought
“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented and fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small doesn’t serve the world. There’s nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It’s not just in some of us, it’s in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”
Marianne Williamson, A Return to Love, Harper Collins 1993
Read by Nelson Mandela in his Inauguration Speech, May 1994